Sorry for having mental issues (~bipolarity let's call it crisis), which I even mentioned in my original application. If you're not 100% retarded and unable to think you would've been able to read that.
If you suck at understanding, please, keep mirroring my behavior towards me, and only towards me. It's not at all connected to how the clan is getting rekt with its current recruitment system, inner organization, leadership change that prefers to block, remove and hide content instead of allowing freedom of speech and proper discussions e.g.. Conflicts get shoved under the carpet rather than being solved.
I'm done. I cared, I was helpful, put shitloads of time and effort into this community without hesitation. Even tried to get back to WoT just for the sake of playing again with people who actually missed me.
And all I got for it was to get rekt when I wasn't working flawlessly. Really appreciated.
Months ago I was told I should stop apologizing for my behavior, when I as Xen called it, "brainfarted".
So I basically didn't even help you understand which behavior of mine was normal, and which wasn't, because I took it as too annoying anyway.
It is really nice when you start caring about a person, and don't ignore their behavior completely. And then they just start triggering you on a daily basis, call it "trolling", for their own amusement.
Some days before I left the clan for good (~3 weeks ago), I told myself I wanted to stop playing WoT. To which was connected to loosen the contact to IDEAL, so to make it easier to pull off, I was particularly grumpy towards the community. So that even if I wanted to rejoin, I couldn't, because I knew I had a bad conscience about what I did, although it was basically nothing. It did the job. At least until I offered to fill up a CW with another guy's account, because although I left IDEAL, I still wanted to be helpful. You know, that's what you do when you're a basic nice person. Then I played that CW and some SH battles, and realized how I missed the clan. Shouldn't have done that.
What also bothered me very few days after I left, was that Story taunted me with the fact that I could've been promoted. For no fucking reason. Even defended his doing after being questioned.
If I was told the promotion part, I wouldn't have behaved negatively at that time, reconsider my stay, and maybe everything would be fine. Or I would've left nicely. But transparency of the leadership towards even the people who are directly concerned was too much to ask for.
This text doesn't even cover half of what's supporting my reasoning and following reactions, but I hope it's good enough as an explanation.
Anyway, I know I fucked up with IDEAL, and I know you don't want to be bothered with my name anymore. Neither do I regarding IDEAL.
Consider this my last post. I'm at last done with this clan as a whole, several members excluded of course.
Good luck for all upcoming stuffs.