stronk interwebz stuff

[Alm1ghtyArtur]

phpBB [video]

[Paris_Hilton]

i also want a mini me

[Yung4mo]

[Alm1ghtyArtur]

[Alm1ghtyArtur]

I translated some pretty bad jokes from a polish site for you.

Day as usual, Martin - simple primary school student comes home back from school.
Everything would be amazing if it wasnt for the group of hooligans at the entrance of the building.
Every time he was passing next to them they asked the same question, "Why are you looking?" then he tried to ignore them. Martin had enough, he thought to himself "I have to answer them something so they stop doing this" And now our Martin is thinking, day, two, a week. Suddenly he figured it out, he prepared, drank a shot for courage and starts getting home from school. He spots the hooligans, he hates them, He feels like he was born for this, he looks at them, they see him. Martins answer is inside of his head all the time, plan is perfect. The leader of hooligans then stands up and asks
- You want me to hit you?
- Thats what my eyes are for.


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In Texas (USA) a man had an accident while cleaning his weapon. He accidentaly shot two black men and stabbed the third one.'


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Professor: A plane carres 500 bricks. One brick fell of the plane. How many bricks are left?
Student: Ha, easy 499!
P: Thats right, next question. How to put an elephant inside of fridge in 3 steps?
S: 1. Open the fridge, 2. Put an elephant, 3. Close the fridge
P: Good, How to put a deer inside of a fridge in 4 steps?
S: 1. Open the door. 2. Take the elephant out 3. Put the deer in 4. Close the fridge
P: Excellent. Next. King of Animals has birthday party, all animals were present except of one, which one?
S: Deer, because he was in the fridge.
P: Amazing, next. Can a grandmother go through the lake full of crocodiles?
S: Yes, they are all at Lions party.
P: Yes, last question, the grandmother died crossing the lake, why?
S: Yhmm, she drowned?
P: And you failed the exam, brick, does it ring a bell to you?


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A friend of mine once got some crazy weed, he said he never ever smoked something like that, and how it usually goes after that he was starving. He went to kitchen, set an oven to 5 mins, put a pizza in and he came back to the room. He said that he sat in the chair and it was so comfortable that he fell asleep. Then he woke up, extremely vigorous, full of life, he said he never slept that well, then he went to kitchen and theres still 2 min till the pizza is done.


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Polish man meets a Scott in Paris, they speak and Scot says.
- You know that I am eating for 4 days in the most expensive restaurants and I didnt pay anything?
- How? Shouted Polish
- I have a way. Answered Scot
- I enter the exclusive restaurant, I order every possible starter, the most expensive soups, then the second meal, the most expensive wine. I drink so slow every waiter goes home and only one is left. When he comes and asks for money, I tell him that I paid to another waiter, he then apologizes and leaves and I go home.
Polish guy really liked the idea, they went to the most expensive restaurant together ordered everything possible, 2000 euro receipt. They drank the wine so slow that everyone left, the main waiter comes and asks for money.
- We paid to another waiter, said the Scot.
- Exactly, and we didnt get the change yet! Added Polish


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A bus stop, there is a guy in a suit waiting for the bus, really intelligent looks, well mannered, when the bus arrived he politely let everyone get in, helped the old lady. The doors close and his head gets stuck, then he starts shouting: "You fucking retarded cunt, stop the bloody kurwa bus, ja pierdole stop it or you cut my head off you dirty fuck" Driver stops, the man slowly walks away, checks if his tie is intact, and says to passengers: "Excuse me dear people, I got scared"


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Situation in cinema. People are watching the new movie premiere, suddenly a guy in the middle row farts and it really stinks.
They guy pokes him and asks, excuse me did you just shit yourself?
- Yes, why?

[BoogieM]

Stronk engineering skillz:

[_GLaDOS]

Stronk architecting skillz:
http://i.imgur.com/qSN5SFR.gifv

FYP

[HowTheStoryEnds]

just so you know we now have a gifv tag for this

Code: Select all

[gifv]http://i.imgur.com/qSN5SFR.gifv[/gifv]

Spoiler:

.webm files can just be shown with the video bbcode

[Daquicker]

just so you know we now have a gifv tag for this

Code: Select all

[gifv]http://i.imgur.com/qSN5SFR.gifv[/gifv]

Spoiler:

.webm files can just be shown with the video bbcode

Nevermind.

[BoogieM]

just so you know we now have a gifv tag for this

Code: Select all

[gifv]http://i.imgur.com/qSN5SFR.gifv[/gifv]

Spoiler:

.webm files can just be shown with the video bbcode

Fixed. Thanks.

and yeah ... "Stronk architecting skillz" is better

[Xen]

[McMokka]

[Xen]

[_GLaDOS]

[Winter]

[Xen]

[Swoopie]

We need our personal space xun :<

[Winter]

phpBB [video]

[somegras]

:Oo:

phpBB [video]

That has to be a joke. Right?

[Daquicker]

:Oo:

phpBB [video]

That has to be a joke. Right?

I'm afraid it isn't